Easy A

I just finished watching Easy A with Emma Stone. First of all, I was completely charmed by both the actress and the character. The movie had me thinking a lot - very different things at very different points. The first thing I was thinking was how silly it was to show the gossip spreading so quickly through such varying social groups, but the truth is that in the days of texting, it really does - it's hard to compare to the speed of word-of-mouth. I was also surprised to see such a frank message regarding reputations and sexual behavior. It's easy to believe, sometimes, that all high school kids are horny, and cool with everyone and anyone sleeping around, and it was refreshing to see a different perspective.

I wonder if I had known someone like her in high school, would I have been intimidated by her and believed the worst of her? It's easy to see why I would have, and I don't want to pretend like I was a non-judgmental person who didn't enjoy gossiping back in the day. But the movie goes far beyond that. People turn on her in a way that goes far beyond idle gossip. They hound her torment her. In the story they happen to believe some lies she told, and that's what they're going on. But even if it were true, what they do to her is disgusting. It is not Godly to pick on someone, especially when that person is already down. It is not okay to demand someone give their body, soul, and reputation over to you.

But the thing I keep thinking is that maybe I was Olive at some points. I definitely have seen girls turn on me for things that have nothing to do with them. I definitely have seen boys lauded for exploits that got me shunned, mocked, and ostracized. A vulnerability was exposed that I didn't recover from for years. It was like they made a crack, and I was slowly leaking out of it. I was a weak and shallow version of myself, floating through life, curled in a defensive position to try to shield myself from the kicks people seemed to like to aim my way.

But overwhelmingly, having just watched this movie, I think - thank God I'm here, at this stage of life, with my husband, my kids, my self-confidence, and all of *that* long ago and far behind me. And those complete shits who did and said horrible things to and about me? I wonder if they think about what they did and squirm. I wonder if they look at their children today and pray that their kids never meet anyone remotely like them. I wonder if after all these years, they look back and still feel powerful for ganging up and hurting someone, or if they learned anything at all in all the years since.

In the end, I was lucky. I have some really solid friends who pulled me through when I was so far down that I couldn't think of a life past that point, when I was so depressed that I dreamed of dying and couldn't get out of bed for days at a time. I have a brother who quietly stood by me and never judged, no matter how anything looked. And I pray that I can be that for my children, too, and that they make strong friendships and have people they know they can turn to, because you never know what adolescence is going to throw your way.