for all who may have missed it

http://utilikilt.com

remember boys - eddie's wedding is this sunday!

NY

god! this city is unreal!!!!!!!! the people here are UNbelievable.

my skirt zipper is broken. how do i know this, given that the zipper is in my tush area and my eyes are not?

my skirt began falling off in the middle of the street. sometime on the subway ride/short walk to the office, it unzipped. i noticed when i felt it pitch down.

and nobody SAID anything to me about it.

i hate this city. i don't care if my skirt falls off in th middle of the street - it can be picked back up. but why does nobody have common courtsey here?

nothing quite so nice

out at dinner tonight with my family we got up and started rounding people up from all around the tables, in all stages of supping out.  there were people just walking in, people ordering, people getting food, people eating, people having dessert, people walking out.  some were in groups, some were couples, some were families, some were on dates.  some were married with kids and don't have the chance to get out alone that often.

and with all that, a minyan of strangers got together and helped my father daven and say kaddish for his father, who died this past september.

these men (and some women) stood in a cluster, taking over the floor of the eatery, swaying.  each one was totally different, each one was giving of their private time to help my father with his mitzvah.

sometimes i really like new york jews.

a new twist

a far more inventive spammer has emailed me to tell me that "your informations was found by auditors who investigated the Nigerian National Petroleum Corporation (NNPC) and Central Bank of Nigeria financial transactions and some Security/Finance Company details."

to fix this terrible situation, he requests that i send your informations,the amount of money spent by you on the transaction/payments details,telephone/fax numbers of your partners and names with other details as evidence to us."

quite a clever little fellow, inin't he?

i just need to say

fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.

i miss blogging

news flash

if you're so inclined, check out http://oukosher.org - the new OU consumer web site with just about everything you'll want to know.

the restaurant list will be up in the morning...

you actually heard it here first.  : )

sushi eaters beware

Please be advised that due to recent infestation found, the OK is temporarily suspending certification on all OK certified Nori until the OK can confirm that there is no infestation. Currently the Nori will have to be inspected by the user to ensure that it is not infested.

ah, the smartness of the Dan-ness for not eating sushi. of course, it helped to learn about the process of making seaweed sheets...

soooooo cool

now you can check who's behind the 'K' on those cookies you like, and how careful they are with Kashruth.

ask the rabbi...

...then decide for yourself:

I would like to thank you VERY MUCH for sending me the answer to a question that I originally sent to the “Ask The Rabbi” website. I suspect that they forwarded it to you. A few years ago, I heard of a newly discovered creature in Indonesia. It was a pig that had cloven hooves and chewed its cud. I asked if this pig could be considered Kosher. The very scholarly article that you sent to me was extremely enlightening. When I asked some Rabbis this question, the usual answer was that, by tradition, nothing in the pig family is Kosher even if it qualified on the two main criteria. I now know (assuming the the information given in the article is accurate) that there is no way that this creature can be considered Kosher. Even if it were, where could I obtain meat from it?

the new evolutionist theory?

see, a whole bunch of monkeys got sick, and then they started walking upright.

pictures: here

http://www.ofoto.com/BrowsePhotos.jsp?&collid=37961947106&page=1&sort_order=0

http://www.snapfish.com/thumbnailshare/AlbumID=12875826/t_=10766000

http://www.snapfish.com/thumbnailshare/AlbumID=12818644/t_=10766000

and of course, we have a box full of proofs that we're going through.  so... fun.  i'll link these on the side so you crazy people can access them all the time.

i wish i could

Q1:
Thank you for replying quickly to my previous request concerning Hanover Broccoli. I have a question:

We recently bought freshly picked green beans from a farmer’s market - they were organic green beans, ie., I understand that to mean that there were no pesticides used in growing them . Does this present a problem of bugs? Do I have to check each green bean before cooking/using it?

Please advise...they’re aging in my fridge.

Thank you.


A1:
Beans in the United States are generally clean. However, on rare
occasions, beans may be infested with worms. In such instances, there are usually telltale holes on the surface of the beans. As an added precaution, or when beans have been stored for a lengthy period in warm and/or humid conditions, soak beans for approximately half an hour. Wormy beans will generally float to the top of the water.

Q2:
Just to clarify - I meant STRING (green) beans. Is the answer still the same?

Thanks

A2:
Yes, we are aware that you were talking about string beans. String beans are called string beans because they are beans. Just stringy

check it out

http://ibihost1.com/nycdoh/web/html/rii.pl

check each restaurant that you go to.  watch out!  time out in the heights is cleaner than estihana.

Akiva Shamai ben Ahava Rivka

Emailed to me today:

As Shabbos Chazon is a time of introspection when we recognize our need for achdus in Klal Yisroel, we are requesting your help to work as a klal for the sake of a single Yid.  We are asking you to dedicate shiurim and learning on Shabbos Chazon, particularly during the hours of 5 - 7 pm EDT, as a z’chus for a refuah shleima on behalf of Akiva Shamai ben Ahava Rivka, a young talmid chacham, husband and father who has been comatose for the past two months.  In order to better focus our kavana, please announce at the beginning of the shiur or session that the limud Torah should be a z’chus for him.  May we be zoche to refuos and yeshuos in the merit of your learning and show of achdus.

We hope that the following story will serve as an inspiration for the power of dedicating the merit of collective learning on behalf of those in need.

Hamodia - Magazine Section

Stories of Hashgacha Pratis and Niflaos HaBorei

6 TAMMUZ, 5764

JUNE 25, 2004

(Reprinted with permission)

 

Do You Believe in Miracles?

The recent Shabbos parashas Behaalosecha was overwhelmingly moving for many of us in the Raanana community. For it was three short years ago on this Shabbos, during the Torah reading of Behaalosecha, that a miracle took place in our midst. Yes, a real-life, blatant, plain-as-the-eye-can-see miracle happened in our town.

Approximately four weeks prior to that Shabbos, a three-year-old girl fell from a second- floor balcony, tragically landing headfirst on the concrete sidewalk below. The head trauma that she suffered was severe.  She was immediately taken to the Schneider Children’s Hospital, where the best of doctors could do little to alleviate the pressure in her brain that was climbing steadily to critical levels. As her brain swelled, she slipped into a coma that continued to deepen until finally, three weeks later on a Thursday afternoon, the doctors relinquished all hope of saving her life. Indeed, the neurosurgeons declared her brain damaged beyond repair and deemed her to be brain dead, clinging to life only by virtue of the life-support machine that was forcing oxygen into her lungs.

Two days later, on Shabbos parashas Behaalosecha, to the total bafflement of the medical staff, this girl began to breathe partially on her own.  She had begun the long and slow process of coming back to life. Admitting that this girl’s responses was a medical miracle, the doctors did not know whether this girl, alive though apparently in a “vegetative state,” would ever be able to regain normal motor and mental function.

Baruch Hashem, today this girl is a picture of perfect health. There seems to be no trace of any brain damage whatsoever, and she is functioning normally for a child her age.

Do you believe in miracles? I definitely do, the more so after experiencing this one and seeing it with my own eyes. I also believe more firmly in the timeless power of Rashi and Torah study after experiencing the uncanny connection between their kedusha and our story.

The first rashi in the parasha asks why the Torah refers to Aharon’s kindling of the menora with the word behaalosecha, “elevating” the lights. The answer is that the Torah is teaching us that Aharon should light the wicks deliberately, making sure to hold the shamash to the wick until the shalhevet, the flame of the wick, is strong enough to “stand up” by itself. Why is this significant? This little girl’s name is Shalhevet. That Shabbos, over two hundred Raanana residents were enjoying a spiritually uplifting weekend of intense Torah study and prayer in the city of Zichron Yaakov. That Shabbos morning, as Shalhevet was lying in a state of suspended death, the speaker lectured to the audience that perhaps Rashi is telling us that just as Aharon would light the wicks so that the shalhevet, the flame, would arise on its own, so too, our little Shalhevet will experience a miracle and will arise on her own.

Thereupon, it was decided that all of the spiritual energy of that Shabbaton would be dedicated to the recovery of Shalhevet. Upon our return to Raanana after Shabbos, her father revealed that Shalhevet had begun to partially breathe on her own at the very same time that we were reading this verse in the Torah on which Rashi comments.

Perhaps, you will say, it is presumptuous to connect this miracle to the power of Torah study. That’s because you don’t know the first half of the story. It turns out that while Shalhevet was lying in her coma for three weeks, many of us visited her father at the hospital to give him much-needed support. Only Hakadosh Baruch Hu, certainly not I, knows where he found the strength to concentrate on Torah study during the course of this terrible ordeal. But personally, I bear witness to the fact that whenever we would study Torah together, the condition in Shalhevet’s brain, measured by means of a pressure gauge, would show a slight improvement, reverting back to its critical state after the Torah study would cease.

This phenomenon occurred not once or twice, but many times over those first three weeks. Apparently, the strength of our Torah study was not sufficient to pull Shalhevet out of her coma. Evidently, the merit and power of our communal Torah study and prayers during the Shabbaton weekend was strong enough to bring Shalhevet out of her coma and allow her to begin her path to recovery.

Shalhevet was released from the hospital but was unable to walk, talk or perform the simplest of activities. Once again, the community rallied to her side and provided the necessary stimuli and encouragement, together with continued prayer and Torah study, to help bring her back to health.  A couple of w
eeks after arriving home, Shalhevet once again progressed in her mental and motor abilities, to the utter amazement of the medical community.

Seeing this adorable girl, who is healthy and happy today, Baruch Hashem, and pondering the events relating to her miraculous recovery, should lead the rational, intelligent Jew to conclude that the Jewish people, the Torah and Hashem Yisbarach are undeniably bound together as one. When we all work together, we, together with the strength of Hakadosh Baruch Hu and His Torah, can make the greatest of miracles happen.

Shalhevet’s family was told that they should publicize this story. May G-d bless Shalhevet and her entire family with health, happiness and nachas!

Rabbi Dovid Horwitz

Raanana

if you're lactose intolerant

you probably don't want yogurt for breakfast, cream of broccoli soup and baked potato with sour cream for lunch, followed by pizza/ziti for dinner.

just hazarding a guess

obviously my brain has fried

sometimes i think avraham's right and i should go for smicha.

slowwwwwwwwwww

today for the first time i noticed a sign (that they were putting up on a pole outside of my building) taht said that Amsterdam is closed to thru traffic between 183rd and 186th from 8 am to 11 pm.

i'm told that this is not a new sign.  well, it's new to me, and now you know.

looking back

i would have run away sooner from pictures to the Kabalat Panim, because that's where i wanted to be.  one more or less picture of me and some people won't make a difference to me in 50 years - having given a Bracha to someone at my wedding or not will.

i would have made sure that the people taking pictures knew what to take pictures of, because they hadn't done a Jewish wedding before.  specifically, pictures of the tana'im, Kesuva, and dancing on the women's side would be cool.

i would have insisted that my bridemaids where green because i hate the color they walked in (sorry, sar).  it was a dream of mine since i was in high school, and other than photoshopping the fianl effect, i can't undo it now.

basically, the things i really cared about before aren't exactly the things i cared about after.  i didn't want my parents carrying candles, but they did, and aside from almost lighting me one fire, you can barely see it in the pictures.  so long as i never have to see those ugly things again, i think i can let it go.  i didn't want a video, but now there is one, and i don't have to ever watch it if i don't want to.

so - figure out what you'll care about.  remmeber that you're paying for it.  feel free to take a stand about some stuff.

and happy one month anniversary, honey.  : )

updates

Regular (unflavored) domestic and Canadian unflavored beers are Kosher without supervision.  Dark beers brewed overseas may have grape extract added to the brew.

Mike’s Hard Lemonade/Ice Tea are not under anyone’s hashgacha.

I just called the OK, who confirmed that Smirnoff Ice in the states is NOT kosher, however it is certified in Israel because it is made from a Kosher base there.  Smirnoff does not allow the sale of the Israeli product in America.

Red Bull is not Kosher because it's made with a hot fill system - on non-Kosher equipement.

Addendum - Skyy Blue is certified Kosher Parve when bearing the OK symbol.  THe certificate expires in May 2005, so check back then.

for all those...

... who may have missed it

http://www.angelfire.com/crazy/jermage/permission.html

lalalala

this is going to be a ridiculously good summer.

just thought you should know

r' kelemen

when i was in israel i learned under Rabbi Kelemen.  He had written two books at the time, Permission to Believe and Permission to receive.

 

In true let's decorate our apt/we're obsessed with Rabbi Kelemen fashion, we decorated our kitchen with "future" titles of Rabbi Kelemn's books:

permission to conceive -

permission to retrieve -

permission to relieve -

permission to acheive -

permission to deceive -

permission to bereave -

permission to be naive -

Baruch Dayan Emeth

my great-aunt died on sunday.

my Grandma's older sister.

i can't say as i really remember her that well.  Last i saw her was at grandpa's funeral in september.  we didn't know that she was dying of leukemia.

i don't feel a thing right now.

july 4th

Shabbat was good...  it's all a blur now, but i recall havig fun.

saturday night we ran around a lot until we collapsed into a pile of ice cream and snack food.  ahhhhh  fat, sweet fat...

wildly good party, as usual.  we had a romp with frisbees and flying cessnas and motorcycles and grrrrreat barbecue, if i do say so myself.

we thought about the drive-in, but it was spiderman, and really.. who wants to sit through that crap twice?

i read a book through fireworks for the first tim ever.  : (

so we went for ices instead.  then we ran around at various places for a while, and settled in to watch swing kids.  great movie, made me cry hysterically.

i love the 4th at the lake  : )

hey

just a quick note -

i was thinking about quitting blogging for a number of reasons.

i remembered that i'm not a quitter.

just now i'm realizing that there are things i hate about people, and certain annoyances in my life are contant reminders of all that i hate.

thank you for pointing out to me so vividly how good everyone else is. i cherish you for that.