soulmates

i have htis friend, female, who i've known ssince she was born ( i was about 3 months old, so i didn't know her v actively at first). she's wonderful, and when she's around, there's more of a smile on my face. she's the only person i've met that i can really see myself living with forever and not getting annoyed. my sister says we're soulmates.

: ) she was in town last night, back from learning in israel and on a short vacation from some fabulous learning retreat thing for the summer.

at about midnight, she decided she needed to take a dunk in the lake. yes, it's safe, but just in case, i took a flashlight with us, 2 towels (for her, i wasn't in the mood to swim, shower, dry my hair, etc, knowing i'd have to be up @ 7 am), a plastic tablecloth to spread on the dock so my tushy woulnd't get wet from the remnants of the earlier rainfall that day, and a can of Off bugspray.

now, my friend is a v free spirit, and being as it was midnight in the middle of nowheresville PA, she wasn't in the mood to be encumbered by a bathing suit. she stripped down while i stared at a cloudfilled sky, and dove into the water. it was a beautiful night - the weather was just right, and i had my favorite wall hanging on as a head wrap. happiness all around. we were chatting, and i was pretending to morse code with strangers across the lake, when suddenly a group, no a swarm, of people arrived lakeside. nosy me began flicking my flashlight towards them, trying to make out their identities (it was all v hush hush and mysterious, you know).

suddenly one of them said "Dani? is there a boy with you?"

thick-headed me, not comprehending why i was being asked that said "no, why? and who are you?"

"great! we're coming in!" and a gaggle of one of the most straight-laced families of women all began racing down the dock and into the water. hehe. 5 feet from where my friend was treading, us both in hysterics (more toward the laughter sde, though). 3 generations of them, splashing, playing ring around the rosie...

my friend unobtrusively murmured "i'm going to swim down that way... why don't you join me?"

i gathered up her clothes, the towels, the flashlight, and began my hazardous (lightless) and barefoot journey to my family's private dock, a short distance away and hidden in the trees.

now all my friend had left to do was haul herself up out of the water onto the dock. he. she began to and re-thought it when the possibility of splinters crossed her mind. i draped a towel over her wwhich she wrapped around the essentials, and she waded towards me. they must have thought we were stoned off our asses, cause we couldn't stop giggling. sof sof, in stead of following my plan and nonchalantly hanging out for a fwe minutees ti lwe could bolt home, we ran back, grabbed the rest of out stuff, and bolted immediately.

emergency

please say tehillim for ruth shira bat yaffa -

she's a friend who was hit by taxi on erev shabbat and is now in a coma.

4th

i went to the stadium with my parents and some friends, to our box, to take in the philharmonic and some fireworks.

they started off by singing the national anthem. i walked outside, goofing around, and made a production of putting my hand over my heart, and started singing along. somwhere in the middle of kidding, i started to mean it.

i realized that this year was the first 4th of july since sept. 11th that i was celebrating publicly. i normally just have a barbecue party and forget about the day, what we're supposed to be commemorating and celebrating. but as i was singing, it hit me that it's been almost 2 years, and here we are, together, singing at a free concert, and i'll be damned if there weren't some tears running down my face by the time the choir walked off the field.

it shook me. it re-awakened the pride i had felt, the citizenship i had felt as child, pledging my allegiance to a flag that said i have the right to prefer Israel as my homeland withou giving up my right to be free and protected underneath the stars and stripes. i have the right to be whomever i want and to join with thousands of strangers in proclaiming that. this country is something spectacular, and i forgot that for 2 years. i let it freeze inside me.

i want to go around the world to all the people who hate me for where i'm from and shout "I"m proud to be an American!". because this year, watching the people come together to listen to patriotic music, watching the fireworks and the joy of the children, i was enthralled again as i haven't been in far too long. i was alive again.

there was something magical about that flag...

hakarat hatov

while i'm going through the amazing people i've had the good fortune to live with, i want to be sure to thank these people right now so they know how important they are to me (yet another take a moment day) (and no, i'm not suicidal)

first of all, my first roommate ever, hadar.
the glow-in-the-dark ET stickers that terrified me so much that abba had to come in and kneel by my head until i fell asleep.
convincing me to eat paper napkins til i threw them all up one night.
the good night stories - batman and superman.
moving down the hall from you, and sneaking in those late night games of casino and gin.

and then sara.
chapman's lake, the night that there was that electric storm with the heat lightning, and i was so scared, and you let me climb into bed with you.
you gave me the only thing you'd ever won in a contest.
you taught me how to put on makeup, and i trusted you to put the mascara on me, too. (guys have no idea what a tremendous thing that is to be abel to say)
teaching me how to dress in 6th grade, starting me on that big jump from little girl to teenager.

miiko. my crazy crazy girl.
pieces of Torah flew out of your mouth as naturally as song comes out of mine.
you always had room in your bed for someone who needed to cry, or laugh, or just lie there and talk and talk...
"are you normal?"
sleeping on your stomach and laughing at tzip and me
bringing everything within my reach, showing me i could go anywhere, do anything
making my bed "just because".
ooh, i miss you!

speaking of tzippy:
without you i don't know who i would be today
you know my most inner thoughts.
exploring yerushalayim together
shabbat afternoons, pillows on the floor... challah and chumus
my partner in every class, reading and sharing ramblings
drawing
and stern. who could forget stern?
you believe in me more than i could ever believe in myself

SCR. hehe. (SCRP)
reliving (the good parts of) high school
singing in the stariwells
SCDS
dress-up! nice makeup...
taking me seriously when i didn't know how, and knowing when to laugh and make it all better
pulling me through freshman year
bla bla "quotes" bla

i've been very lucky with you all. thank you so much. i love you and i miss you.
some i saw as recently as this morning, some i haven't seen in 3 years. you're all equally in my thoughts, every day.

oy

i was re-thinking that posting on commitment, and i want to apologize. the piece i meant to write was supposed to be original, thought-provoking... not me going off on dating these days, and repeating ideas you can find in any dating column or book. i will be re-writing it when i am fully awake and engaged and probably sugared up as well, and then we can assess what i have to say.

in the meantime, COME TO MY HOUSE! (party this sunday if you didn't get the email)

i'm kinda bored, kinda over tired. and i'm getting a tan. life is glorious!

i love 2 year old boys. koby locked himself in the bathroom this morning. well, not locked. he got stuck cause he couldn't get the door open.

my sister told me last night that we were in the car on sept 16th, 1983 (i was born sept. 15, 1979), and i turned to her and said "i remember when i was three!" (pronounced thwee, thank you, lisp and all)

i need to sleep more than 4 hours a night. argh! did i mention my tan?