new take on an old story

40

and so immature.  i came up with a nickname for avraham a few years back that was just for my use, and a few friends who heard it adopted it.  that occassionally bothered me, but mostly i let it slide.  then a friend started using the same nickname for her boyfriend.  and quite honestly, it's annoying.  mostly because it's my own sweet nickname for my husband, but partly because when the four of us are together and she's calling someone else by his name (by choice!) it's no longer special.  i feel a little robbed.  i didn't think it would bother me because i rarely see them, but it really does.  part of that, most likely, is that the boyfriend didn't know that i had come up with the nickname and thought i was weird when i said somehting about her stealing it.

this is what happens when i don't sleep.  i lie in bed and think about stupid things.  if i were writing a book or a movie, by the way, this would be the point at which the crazy friend (me) decides that the easiest solution is to lose the friendship, and therefore maintain the illusion that the name is special again.

ok, but really, she should have asked me before she co-opted it.  everyone else who calls avraham by it asked first.  is that what bothers me?  i don't know.  too hard to tell.

anyhow, an exterminator came by yesterday and fumigated our place (our summer place, that is, no one has yet had need to spray anything in our real apartment thank GOD).  we slept on the other side of the house last night becase A and Y were in manhattan and graciously offered us their guest room.  the weird thing about this whole summer setup is how to share these spaces (because each is so small, and we're constantly in and out of each other's homes) while still respecting one another's space.  i.e. i don't want to get overly familiar with their home because it is after all theirs and they should always feel that they have their own area.  i keep thinking about how one could construst a pass-through from one side of the house to the other.  i actually was designing one in my mind last night til i remembered that i'd need to see blueprints or layout plans to see where the wires are, and then realized that there probably are no official plans for the wall they threw up in the middle of the house.  so, i'm not going to take a hammer or saw to the wall, but i'm now very curious to see if i could research enough to find out how to do it.

ok, i have to get moving and put on clean clothes and make phone calls and start my day!  it's only 11 am, after all.

41

Riverdale has never looked better.  We have earwigs and ants.  The earwigs seem to have originated from a couch we took from someone, and the ants - well, maybe they and the earwigs are in cahoots?  Hoping that today we'll get screens up, a screen door installed, and the sink fixed so it won't leak all over my floor as i wash out dishes and glasses.  Which, of course, makes the ant situation even more fun - we had a melava malka, and then couldn't wash the glasses out because of the sink, and then the ants descended.  YUCK.

The exterminator is coming back today (yes, back - the external spray last week only worked for a day) to fumigate the place.  We're sleeping elsewhere for the night.

and i think i have an ant bite on my hand.  grrrrr

43

so, i know you can be overwhelmed.  and i know you can be underwhelmed. but can you ever just be whelmed?

... i think you can in europe

48

i managed today for only the second time to successfully give myself a manicure.

now if i could only manage to shower, get dressed, and do some work for school...

49

first off, i want to state that I am aware of my own negativity.  let that just be out therebefore i start talking about theissue in general.

i find that more and more the women i talk to are very negative about things.  it seems to be an unconscious response, but generally i find that when a topic is brought up, it immediately veers into negativity waters.

i say women because that is where i have experienced the problem.  i'm not claiming that men do not suffer from it, simply that i haven't personally experienced it as regularly with them.

this bothers me on two levels - one, it is extremely unhealthy to have one's got reaction to things be negative.  two, it is extremely unpleasant for those around you who must either respond or ignore what has just come out of a friend's mouth.  responding most certaintly will lead to a conversation about the topic, and validate the negative opinion to some extent - if we are to converse, than your negative gut reaction is not just an unhealthy reading of what's going on around you, but now is simply a side to take in a disagreement.  ignoring it frustrates the second person, if not the one expressing the opinion, and doesn't deal with the fact that the reaction is often either unwarranted or over the top.

i am keenly aware of my own tendency to be negative.  i try to watch it, and i try to be funny instead of outright dismissive or depressing.  but maybe it would help us all to step back a bit in conversation and recognize that some side comments (such as "oh, she's so sweet") do not need a response, and that surely the proper response is not a rebuttal ("you think so?  i just don't see it.").

rant over, novacaine has worn off from mouth, and i am now off to eat food seeing as i can taste it finally.  : )

55

Let us eat cake

for today, we celebrate two years of wedded life.

TWO YEARS!

does not feel like it at all.  just like it's been a long while of fun and living with my best friend.

i love you, avs.  : )

56

i feel like i had things to say at some point, but they've left my head.

i am not a fan of norton anti-virus.

and the MO conference starts tomorrow and i can't go.

i got a great manicure for 5 bucks

and i need to return shoes to aerosole.

i'm listing things here because otherwise i'll forget.

sarah's home (not that with an 'h' is avraham's sister, without is mine).  so good to see her.  we stopped by for shifra's bridal shower.  caught the tail end.  which is good, cause i couldn't have been there for the whole thing - i'm too damn impatient.  i barely made it through my own.

i have to go find paper to apply my sequins and glue to.  don't tell avraham, but i'm making him an anniversary card (tomorrow's two years).

doesn't quite feel like that long...

60

it was a lovely hour spent at target.  explain to me why anyone registers for 18/0 flatware...  if you're asking people to buy you stuff, why not buy stuff that wll survive the first year of marriage?  i mean, 'stainless steel' doesn't come crappier than that.

does anybody but me research stuff before they register for it?

on a happy note, we bought Apples to Apples for Shabbat, because my previous set of the game was taken over (hostilely, of course) by my family at their summer home.  if youve' never played it, try it.  if you don't think it's fun, drink some vodka and try again.

i shoudlo be eating lunch, but i can't make myself get out of this uncomfortable chair to do it.  and i should do it soon, seeing as i have an appointment in under an hour.  lalalalalala

weather reports - rumors of the rain stopping and some sunshine peaking through.  Shallow Dani wants to have a nice tan for the weddings, so just in case, i bought one of those jergen's facial mousterizer/tanner things.  i hope i don't turn orange.  if i do, i know enough lawyers.  what?

and this afternnon i'm finally dragging my sorry self to go look at hats at the riverdale mikvah.  navy or pink, navy or pink?  if the dress is navy with some irridescent navy/hot pink action going on, and i wear open toe espadrilles with a rocking hot pink manicure, what color hat is more appropriate?  and do i go for the more or the less appropriate one?  so many questions.

also, how the hell am i getting to Char's wedding without collapsing?  HELP!  i have to get from the hamptons to teaneck to philly by 11:30 am or so, and then reverse to riverdale.  avraham probably can'tget off of work, so it's just me.  ra.  am so tired.

it amazes how after about 2.5 hours of movement i need to rest.  anyone want to hire me a personal chaffeur?  did i spell that wrong?  i can't remember...

61

singing:
listen to your heart when he's calling for you.
listen to your heart - there's nothing else you can do.
i don't know where you're going, and i don't know why -
Listen to your heart before you tell him goodbye.

da da da da da da da da

d d d d d d d

I want to go to a concert!!!

although, the David Broza concert was AWESOME - long version or short version?

ok, long version:

we met hadar and marisa at makor for dinner, where the concert was going to be.  as hadar came down the stairs (we were all looking at the legs coming down the stairs, and all the rest of the legs we'd seen were too short),  david broza went up them.  hadar walks over to the table and we're all like "that was him!"  and he says "i know.  be right back"

and hadar jogs back up the stairs.  comes back down a minute later with david broza in tow.  they head over to our table, we all say hi.  hadar points me out as his sister Daniela who LOVES his song Daniela.  he smiles.  they sit down, and we start to talk about his music.  marisa and hadar tell him they love one of his realy old songs, and ask if he can perform it.  he says that it's so old, he forgot the lyrics.  so hadar pulls out his ipod and hands it over so DB can write down the lyrics.  which he does, and the moment was just too cool - eating dinner with David Broza at the table, he's listening to hadar's ipod, and i'm in complete heaven.

the rumor is (and this is unsubstantiated) that he winked at me while performing Daniela.  he is too cool.

god, i just love concerts.

good old scranton initiative

from my Ima (Mother):

Dear Friends,

I want to share with you something that our little Bais Yaakov in Scranton is doing tomorrow that should be emulated and copied in every Day School and High School, and done in some form in every yeshiva ( I mean boys,too, in a different form).

The girls of BY are hosting a bridal shower for one of the kallahs from the former Gush Katif, a young lady formerly from Netzer Chazani who is getting married later this month and will, IY"H, move with her husband to a caravan. 

The girls printed up and mailed out invitations (their own computer design and printing) in which, they explained what the shower is for, put a suggested gift list on the back of the card, and clearly stated that weight is a consideration and that a check or cash would be most welcome instead. The suggested gift list was actually titled "bridal registry", and the invitation asked that whoever purchases an item please call the school so that it could be crossed off the list. They pre-arranged with several people who plan to go over to Israel soon to take the gifts and added a note about the 220 electric current.  They have been very organized, and  have also prepared a light lunch (with RSVP) so it will be like a real shower. 

An article appeared in our Federation Reporter, and you should know that people are coming and contributing who would not normally respond to a request for money.

The idea was their principal's,  Mrs. Esther Elefant, an incredible woman, and I think the biggest compliment she could get would be that the same idea, or variations on it, be done in every possible community.

Please pass this on to as many people as possible. Anyone needing a source to turn to for individual brides ( or whatever idea they conceive of) can write to me, and I will then give them the contact person's e-mail.

Thanks,  with much love,

Tova

62

off for a dress fitting today - weddings are in 3.5 weeks, and this is my first fitting.  I'm also going to take the "I'm in midtow" opportunity to go LIBS and get my hair cut, my eyebrows waxed, and maybe even a pedicure and manicure.  keep in mind, people, thisis the place where i got a 3 hour hair-do for my cousin's wedding, and it cost me a grand total of $25.  so if all this extravagance today costs more than that, i'll be completely shocked.  i really just have a whole afternoon between the dress fitting and a class at 6:30 to do whatever i want.  ooh, i should get shoeseseseses for the wedding today too.  yay!

girly shopping day!

63

i'm so tired.  i have about 6 weeks of school left, which means 2 more papers for cinema, an essay for education, and 3 decent research papers for ed as well.  i should get cracking on all of this, of course, but I'm way too tired to do anything but sit and space out.

the double wedding day is in 3.5 weeks, and i'm going for my first dress fitting tomorrow.  no reason to be nervous, but feeling unprepared for stuff is not a way i like to run my life.

the past 2 weekends in the hamptons have been fun - we need to start calling people and inviting them out, but i seriously have no energy to even remember who i like to hang out with.  sad.  marti - let me knwo when you guys can come; i'll try to call.

i've been looking for scissors all morning and can't find anything - think this means i have avraham put them away in some ingenious hiding spot which i promptly forgot about.

whil we're at the rambling thing, mazal tov to nomi, kivi, and big brother ami on the birth and naming of eliora rut!    cute little bugger.

and i just dropped the phone.  not out of shock or anything good, just clumsiness.